Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Cruise Ship Dos and Cruise Ship Don'ts

It is day three of the intrepid Nancy B’s and my Panama Canal Cruise on #HollandAmerica.  So far, we’ve embarked (day one and exhausting), stopped at Half Moon Cay (day two and relaxing), and cruised the Caribbean Sea (today and the jury is still out).  Tonight is our first formal night and we have reserved an early dining table.  In other words, we are out early birding the early birds!

I haven’t learned many dos and don’ts on this cruise (yet).  So far, we’ve stood in the reserved dining table line twice when we haven’t had a reservation and they’ve just seated us (we whisper when we get to the head of the line).  And, we’ve learned that we are an anomaly and so everyone remembers our name and we remember just the names of the last couple we met.

I have, however, learned a lot about cruises from the movies and am in the mood for sharing.  See if you can guess the movie (answers are at the end).  The photos accompanying this post are from my tour of the ship to test out my new camera lens.

A.  Always Go Up!
If the ship capsizes and your world is suddenly turned upside down with the ceiling at your feet and the floor above your head, start climbing.  Under no circumstances listen to the crazy man telling you to stay put because the hull is too thick to cut through. 

B.  If You Fall in Love
Choose a man who is willing to freeze to death for you because that tiny bit of wreckage you are clinging to is only strong enough to hold you and someone is going to die.

C.  Know How to Drive the Boat
You never know when you’ll be called on to drive the boat while the really hunky guy is off killing terrorists.  Be prepared.

D.  Do Not Bring a Tribble Home
They will just reproduce and eat you out of house and.  (Editor’s note, these are the voyages of the starship… -- ‘nuf said?)

E.  If You Fall in Love Redux
Do not, under any circumstances, make plans to meet at the top of the Empire State building on Valentine’s Day or any day for that matter.  It most assuredly will not turn out well.

Answers:  (A) Poseidon Adventure (original); (B) Titanic; (C) Speed 2; (D) Star Trek; and (E) An Affair to Remember

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